Letting Go of What I Can't Control

For a long time, I tried to control how things turned out.

I wanted people to understand me. I wanted the ones who mattered to stay. And when they didn't, I would replay it over and over, trying to figure out what I could have said or done differently.

What I've slowly learned is that I can't make anyone understand me. And I can't make anyone stay.

That was a hard thing to accept. For a while it felt like giving up. But it turned out to be the opposite.

All the energy I was spending on overthinking, on worrying about what someone else thought or what might happen next, started coming back to me. I had more room to focus on what I can actually change: how I show up, how I treat people, how I take care of myself, and the next small step in front of me.

I'm not saying I've mastered this. Some days I still catch myself replaying a conversation or trying to hold on to something that isn't mine to hold. But I notice it sooner now, and I let go a little faster.

It's fall here, and I keep thinking about the trees. They don't hold on to every leaf. They let go, and they make room for what's next.

I'm learning to do the same.

Follow my journey on Substack, and join me on X at @Mark_Salinas.